3 Self-Kindness Practices to Boost Self-Esteem

We often talk about the importance of self-esteem believing in ourselves, feeling worthy, and recognising our strengths but what we don’t always talk about is the quiet foundation that holds it all together: self-kindness.

When your inner voice is harsh or critical, confidence and self-worth begin to fade. But when you treat yourself with compassion — especially on the days you feel like you’ve fallen short that’s when true self-esteem begins to grow.

Here are three simple yet powerful self-kindness practices to help you nurture a gentler, more empowering relationship with yourself.

1. Speak to Yourself Like You Would a Friend

In my work as a therapist, I see firsthand how unkindly people speak to themselves. It’s something that comes up time and time again, that inner critic that’s quick to judge, shame, or tear down. That’s why I often encourage people to practise noticing those moments when they’re being harsh or critical and gently challenge that inner voice.

Think about how you speak to the people you love when they’re struggling. You’d never tell them they’re not good enough or that they’ve failed. You’d encourage them, remind them of their strengths, and help them see things from a kinder, more understanding perspective.

Now imagine offering that same compassion to yourself.

Try this: the next time you make a mistake or feel like you’ve let yourself down, pause and ask, “What would I say to a friend right now?” Then, say those same words to yourself — out loud if you can.
Over time, this small but powerful shift begins to rewire your inner dialogue. You start to become your own ally, offering yourself the same warmth and understanding that you so readily give to others.

2. Create Small Moments of Care Each Day

Self-kindness isn’t only about what we say; it’s also about how we care for ourselves in daily life. It’s in the gentle moments taking a deep breath before starting your day, giving yourself permission to rest, or making a cup of tea and sitting in silence for a few minutes.

These small acts signal to your mind and body that you matter.

Try choosing one small act of kindness to commit to each day this week. Maybe it’s journaling before bed, stepping outside for fresh air, or setting healthier boundaries with your time. These actions build self-respect and help you reconnect with your worth.

I have adopted a facecare routine that I do at the end of the day, I use lavender oil on my pillow and I light nice smelling candles around my home and bedroom as a way of caring and nurturing myself.

3. Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection

Low self-esteem often grows from unrealistic expectations the belief that we need to get it all right before we can feel proud of ourselves. But true self-worth isn’t about perfection; it’s about progress.

Every time you notice growth, no matter how small, take a moment to celebrate it. Maybe you handled a situation differently, spoke up for yourself, or simply showed up when you didn’t feel like it.

A simple way to do this is by keeping a “self-kindness wins” journal. Each day, write down one way you were kind to yourself, or one small win you achieved. Over time, you’ll start to see just how capable and worthy you already are.

Final Thoughts
Building self-esteem isn’t a one-time exercise it’s an ongoing journey of learning to treat yourself with compassion and respect. Self-kindness is the bridge between who you are now and the confident, empowered version of you that you’re becoming.

So, as you move through your week, remember: you are deserving of the same kindness, patience, and encouragement you so freely give to others.